Wednesday, July 20, 2016

embracing my postpartum body



I shared this post on Instagram and Facebook initially but then decided to share it here as well (especially since it received such a warm, kind and supportive response and seemed to resonate with so many women). Posting on Instagram and Facebook certainly seems to suit my life better now as I mother our little dudes. That said, I'll be posting a 6 month update on those two cuties here at the beginning of August. It's hard to believe they'll be 6 months old soon! I'm learning first hand that time has wings. Hope you'll come back to read it (& see how much they've changed since this post)!

............

Shopping for pieces that better suit this new mama body of mine is a humbling experience. I won't lie, it's been an ongoing period of adjustment and acceptance (our bodies change so drastically post baby). There've been some tearful moments over the past few months while standing in front of my full-to-the-brim closet realizing most of what it contains doesn't fit these days. Twenty extra pounds will do that. Some left over from pregnancy the remainder a result of emotional/stress eating (because this motherhood journey isn't always easy & did you know you can't continue to eat the same amount of food once you stop breastfeeding without major consequences? Yup, it's true. I, well really my ass, did the research for you). 

Ultimately I'm proud and amazed by how my body was able to grow, birth and feed my two little dudes. In fact, I felt like a warrior during childbirth and at the end raised my arms in the air victoriously and shouted (& I'm not making this shit up. Scotty wrote it all down in case I forgot) "Yesss! I'm 40 years old and just gave birth to twins vaginally!" That's how damn proud I was and still am.  I've never felt more powerful or beautiful than I did in that moment.

So instead of whining, complaining & bemoaning the fact I have extra junk in the trunk, I've decided to press in, breathe, focus on healthy habits and accept my new frame. Most importantly I'm practicing self compassion and offering myself extra grace these days. As women we can be so hard on ourselves. 

When I'm laughing, singing, reading or playing with the boys the last thing on my mind is how my body looks. All I care about is their well being & happiness and that they see me happy, too. 

This is not about being thin (which I've never been anyways), it's about being healthy. I'm also not obsessive (& will NEVER give up my foodie title). I just want to feel strong, powerful and comfortable in my own skin. And I'm confident I'll get there. 

Anyone else go through or are going through a postpartum body slump? Or any kind of self image challenges? How did you work through it?

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